"I'm against things," longtime North Carolina resident Pam Beucher said. "I'm for things."
"America!" she added.
"I didn't know Washington, D.C. had Seattle in it," said Connecticut resident Kyle Hinton, an idiot. "Anyway, stop the war! No more hate! Swine flu! Iran! Pharmaceutical companies! Illegal immigrants! Never again!"
At press time the morons had been walking for 10 minutes into a concrete wall in Kennewick, WA, where they eventually stopped to pay their respects to those who lost their lives during the Vietnam War.
Read the whole onion here.
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