Public Service

Announcement

In our never ending attempt to provide useful information to YOU, the general public, and, well, to avoid ANY issues regarding the Fairness Doctrine, we here at the Chronicles occasionally set aside some valued space for helpful tips. So here's our contribution as we end 2008...

AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

To avoid cutting yourself when chopping vegetables, get someone else to hold them while you chop.

To avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat, use the sink.

For high blood pressure sufferers: Simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember, use a timer!

A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives. Then you'll be afraid to cough.

You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and duct tape.

If it doesn't move and should, use the WD -40.

If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

If you can't fix it with a hammer, you have an electrical problem.

Your welcome.

(Hat Tip to Mikey!)