Strange things in my life #39870......
as recorded in my Memoirs, "Raising Smart Asses":

I was leaving the federal jail earlier this week right here in Anytown, USA. I am ALWAYS nervous in the place. I don't do criminal law, but a client has found his way in there. But, I digress…. Me? Very nervous. As I am walking out, I have to retrieve my ID from the guard behind the bullet-proof glass. He starts yapping at me through the glass. "You look just like that guy"! I can barely hear him thru the glass. I say "Huh?" He repeats himself. I hear it. Uh oh. This would qualify as a statement you don't want to hear when your:

1. with a group discussing the guy who ran off with their 13 year old cousin,
2. in a police line up,
3. leaving a prison.

As my blood pressure spiked, the guy behind the glass opens the microphone and says to the guard behind me, "Look at him, he looks just like that COMEDIAN guy!" Being a handsome, worldly barrister and man about town, I suavely reply, again, "Huh?!" As I glance at the guard behind me he says "Yeah that Bill Engvall guy." My mind is confused, however, my blood pressure is dropping as I realize that (a) I have not wet myself and (b) probably won't be arrested. This is a good thing. I laugh, well, perhaps a friendly chuckle, as they continue to compare me to Bill. "I'll bet you get that all the time!" says the glass man as he hands me my drivers’ license. One last chuckle and a nod of the head for effect and I proceed through the large double lock doors.

Let. Me. Out!

As the large, heavy, doors slam solidly behind me, I walk briskly to my car. Bill Engvall, indeed. Today will be an early martini day. Maybe two.....