Heading out to the desert for some R & R...Rum and Relaxation. Happy New Year to you and yours from all of us here at the Chronicles!

See you in 2009!!

Reminiscing

Misty water colored memories.....

Michigan!

Are you aware that Jeff Foxworthy is now picking on Michigan? The bastard nailed me with #30.

You know you're a true MICHIGANDER when…..

1. 'Vacation' means going up north on I-75.

2. You measure distance in hours.

3. You know several people who have hit a deer ….. more than once.

4. You often switch from 'heat' to 'A/C' in the same day.

5. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching.

6. You see people wearing camouflage at social events (including weddings).

7. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.

8. You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them.

9. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

10. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.

11. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction.

12. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.

13. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to your blue spruce.

14. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking age.

15. Down South to you means Ohio.16. A brat is something you eat.

17. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new pole barn.

18. You go out to fish fry every Friday.

19. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.

20. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.

21. You find 0 degrees 'a little chilly.'

22. You drink pop and bake with soda.

23. Your doctor tells you to drink Vernors and you know it's not medicine.24. You can actually drink Vernors without coughing.

25. You know what a Yooper is.

26. You think owning a Honda is Un-American.

27. You know that UP is a place, not a direction.

28. You know it's possible to live in a thumb.

29. You understand that when visiting Detroit , the best thing to wear is a Kevlar vest.

30. If you have worn shorts and a coat at the same time, you might live in Michigan

(Hat Tip to my sister...in Michigan!)

Public Service

Announcement

In our never ending attempt to provide useful information to YOU, the general public, and, well, to avoid ANY issues regarding the Fairness Doctrine, we here at the Chronicles occasionally set aside some valued space for helpful tips. So here's our contribution as we end 2008...

AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

To avoid cutting yourself when chopping vegetables, get someone else to hold them while you chop.

To avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat, use the sink.

For high blood pressure sufferers: Simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember, use a timer!

A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives. Then you'll be afraid to cough.

You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and duct tape.

If it doesn't move and should, use the WD -40.

If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

If you can't fix it with a hammer, you have an electrical problem.

Your welcome.

(Hat Tip to Mikey!)

Me Want One!

Wing's Game...


I am outta here!!

Three Days!

WooooWhooooo!

Red Wings vs Black Hawks on New Years Day ....outdoors...at Wrigley Field.

Beats watching the TangerinePeachOrangeRosePointsettiaGatorCotton Bowels

Well, well...... What military aircraft are you? (click) F-16 Fighting Falcon You are an F-16. You love to flaunt your slick appearance, but aren't afraid to get your hands dirty, either. You can outmaneuver any of your contemporaries, and you possess a technological edge. And above all, you are a true showman.

Click Here to Take This Quiz Brought to you by YouThink.com quizzes and personality tests.

Day Late,

Dollar Short.....

Story of the Rumbear. How did I miss this one??? December 21, 2008?

Oh well, there's always next year.

Monday's Pun(s) !!!!

I once considered becoming a monk when I was young but I was cloisterphobic.

What happened when the cow tried to jump over a barbed wire fence? Udder destruction.

I always get lost driving on New Year's Eve. I blame the Old Lane Signs.

I don't think I was concentrating properly when midnight struck on January 1st 2009. It just went in one era and out the other.

GlowBall Warming,

Duh?!

I'm very puzzled by the nexus between the current downturn and concern about global warming. Given that we were told we had to immediately cut back on carbon emissions (even before sustainable alternative energies are in place), largely by curbing our lavish energy-dependent lifestyles, why then all the concern about stimuli and global depression? Surely, the world right now is sort of what the radical Gorists wanted to see, since the current cutback in gasoline usage, and general economic slowdown are radically restricting the burning of fossil fuels in a manner that even the most optimistic green utopian could hardly have envisioned just few years ago? In other words, in the booming 2004-6 years, radical suggested scale-backs would have probably led to something akin to what we are experiencing now? So why the gloom instead of headlines blaring—"The Planet Continues to Green—as Archaic Consumption Practices Erode Further!"

Me too. So what's up wit dat AlGore??

Caroline Schlossberg,
Senator???

Well Victor Davis Hanson has a view on this that the ole Rumbear takes to heart.

The putative Caroline Kennedy candidacy for senator has had the odd effect of reopening the media can of worms treatment of Gov. Palin. Compared to Sarah Palin's almost immediate immersion into crowds and public speaking, Kennedy seems like a deer in the headlights before the media that is either ignored or asked to submit written questions. Palin was a natural; Kennedy can't finish a single sentence without "You know" or "I mean." Palin's family saga and daily grind were populist to the core; Kennedy is a creature of a few blocks' radius in Manhattan and Martha's Vineyard.

Bottom line...she's a buffoon...yet, I mean that in a good way.

Me? I am still waiting for the Saturday Night Live skit on this......crickets....Tiny Fey? .......... more crickets...anyone?........ Bueller???

Oh, and I WANT a pony!!!!

Merry Christmas!

Here's a little Jeff Dunham & Achmed to brighten your day!

(The Rumbear Clan has tickets to see him on the 16th!!)

Merry Christmas to You & Yours

from all of us here at the Chronicles

Their Freezing Up in Buffalo

Stuck in Their Cars......

and I'm lying here neath the sun and the stars!

Ahhhh,

while AlGore flails and constantly expounds

the effects of GlowBall Warming are no where to be found

Slip sliding into the holidays!

GlowBall Warming Update #1672876

Flight Hazards !

Reading List 2008

So it's that time of year again where I share the reading list. Not quite as prolific as years past. Time has been a precious commodity here in 2008. Nonetheless, some good reads. I enjoyed "Beyond Band of Brothers" by Dick Winters. If you liked the "Band of Brothers" series this book will fill in the details. Currently reading "Traitor to His Class". Keeping FDR in perspective (i.e. Horses Butt) will be important as we enter the age of "O"

Parachute Infantry, An American Paratrooper's Memoir of D-Day By David K. Webster
How to Win & Keep Clients By Jennifer J. Rose
Beyond the Band of Brothers By Major Richard Winters
Liberal Fascism By Jonah Goldberg
Robert’s Rules for Dummies By C. Alan Jennings
To Do My Best, History of the Boy Scouts of America By James West
On My Honor By Gov. Rick Perry
To Be A US Air Force Pilot By Henry M. Holden
The Game By Ken Dryden
Cool It: The Skeptical Enviro Guide to Global Warming By Bjorn Lomborg
Devil Take the Hindmost: Hist. of Financial Speculation By Edward Chancellor
Traitor to His Class: The Privileged Life of FDR By H.W. Brands

Monday's Christmas Pun(s) !!!!

Ah! Christmas! The one day of the year we can all say our children are truly gifted!

Why was Santa's little helper depressed? Because he had low elf esteem.

Someone has stated that the three phrases that best sum up the Christmas season are: "Peace on Earth", "Goodwill to Men" and "Batteries not included."

Bonus Humor.....a Gift of sorts!

Billy: How come you never hear anything about the tenth reindeer, Olive?
Tilly: Olive?

Billy: Yeah, you know... Olive, the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names...

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

Chicago Politics ... Round Two

Yesterday, I pointed out some facts of note about Chicago Politics and the incestuous relationship of the players involved. Today this little puzzle piece popped up..

Blagojevich and Holder appeared together at a March 24, 2004, news conference to announce Holder's role as "special investigator to the Illinois Gaming Board" -- a post that was to pay Holder and his Washington, D.C. law firm up to $300,000.

Holder is Eric Holder, The O-Man's nominee for Attorney General. You know, the one that prosecuted olde Rosty in the House Banking scandal. Well it seems Mr. Holder forgot to mention his dealings with Blago on his questionnaire for the confirmation committee. Prolly just an "oversight", I mean he only made $300K on the deal.

but.....the O-Man knows nothing....

Okay. Now that we are having fun, here's another piece.

Recall, Rahm Emanuel was touting a name as the O-Man's pick to fill his seat. her name is Valerie Jarret. Who is she Rumbear? Well she is the gal that suddenly "withdrew" her name from consideration for the Senate seat after the now famous two hour teleconference with Blago and "undisclosed" individuals alleged to be on the O-man's team. She ran for the hills. She is currently the Chairman of Board of Trustees of the University of Chicago Medical Center.

Yeah, so what? Well let me axe you a question. For whom did Michelle Obama work prior to the O-Man's presidential run? Yup, University of Chicago Hospitals. Hired after the O-Man became a Senator back in 2006. Nice job, earned a salary of $273,618. Quid pro quo? I dunno, you tell me.

and Valerie...well, don't weep for her not getting the Senate gig. Luck be a lady, she found work in these trying times.

On November 14, 2008, President-elect Barack Obama selected Jarrett as White House Senior Advisor and Assistant to the President for Intergovernmental Relations and Public Liaison.[15] Jarrett will manage the White House Office of Public Liaison and work with state and local governments.

but.....the O-Man knows nothing....